A Very Neapolitan Hatred For Summer
Volcanic outburst about heatwaves and impossibility to cool off.
Such awful heat that you can’t even be naked, mosquitoes that eat you alive, sweat that sticks to your skin, the kids that want to go to the beach and the money you spend sending them there, the craziness that grows inside your head and not even a cool shower can help you cool it off …
Really, Dottoré, those people who say, "Summer is so beautiful," I wish something bad would happen to them. The first person who says I’m wrong, I’ll hit them so hard they'll end up in the sea in Mergellina, with all their teeth knocked out … And I’d like to see them try to find a dentist in August!
In a word: I hate summer.
Transcript of a one-act play uttered all in one breath — in Neapolitan. Subtitles for Italian speakers available in my medical records.
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