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TOPIC: dottore

Dottoré!

A Matter Of Mind And Heart — And Maybe Something Else

Our Naples-based psychiatrist talks one of her patients through the possible source of his wife's discontent.

Once a patient asked me:

"Dottoré, is it possible that men and women are born with the same brain, and then it becomes different with age?"

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When A Patient Gets A Little Too Familiar

Our Naples-based Dottoré gets mildly insulted by a well-meaning patient.

"Dottoré, I consider you my good friend. You're like a sister to me, an aunt, a mother, a grandmother!"

"Francé, please, stop right there. I get that you want me in your family tree, but don't call me your grandmother."

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A Child Is Not An Alibi

Our Naples-based Dottoré reflects on the small-time criminals who come to her for therapy, and the family excuse for their lives of crime.

When I talk to a small-time criminal (a real mobster couldn't care less about justifying himself), and I ask him, a bit naively and a bit provocatively, why he deals drugs, the classic response is: "Dottoré, there’s nothing else I can do. I have children to feed."

It's a justification that catches you off guard the first time you hear it, but over time, you begin to reflect on it.

Did anyone force you to have these children? In the past, the poor, the working class, needed to have children to ensure a labor force. Today, in Naples, people have children to provide themselves with an alibi for a life of crime when they can't find legitimate work.

It doesn't really matter how these kids are raised. You see them in groups on their brand new electric scooters at two or three in the morning, riding around the streets.

They scare you because they're unpredictable, but at the same time, you look at them and realize they're just children. Then, compassion and dismay kick in, and you wonder how the parents can stay home peacefully while their kids are out on the streets at night.

You try approaching one and ask, "Aren't you going to school tomorrow?" You get insults and mockery in return. "What school?" You realize you've asked a pointless question.

These kids won't be going to school tomorrow because no one will wake them up. Their parents will be sleeping. Mom spent the night gambling, and Dad is out peddling death.

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War, Children And Snapshots Of Terror

Our Naples-based psychiatrist thinks back at a moment that has forever remained frozen in her mind. In the expression of her son's terror, she sees all the grieving mothers who can do nothing in the face of war.

One day, years ago, my son decided to play a prank on me.

He hid in a corner of the garden, and despite our desperate calls and thorough searching, he stayed hidden for what seemed like a very a long time

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Dottoré!
Mariateresa Fichele

Mothers, Daughters, Nationality: The Tombola Of Fate

Our Naples-based psychiatrist thinks about a little girl she met in the rain, one of two sisters burdened with the unfairness of uncaring parents and a struggle with Italian nationality.

Last night it was pouring in Naples, and I was stuck waiting out the rain at a supermarket entrance. Next to me was a little girl, maybe 3 or 4 years old. A mini lady holding her even smaller sister with her left hand and an enormous shopping bag and umbrella with her right. She seemed to be in a hurry because suddenly she stepped into all that rain, so I held her back.

"Stop, where are you going? It's raining too much! Where do you need to go? I'll go with you; otherwise, how can you handle the umbrella by yourself?"

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Dottoré!
Mariateresa Fichele

Airing Dirty Laundry On The Couch

A patient suggests that our Neapolitan psychiatrist stick to what she knows best.

"Gennà, let me ask you something, do you always do your own laundry?"

"Yes, Dottoré, why?"

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Italy
Mariateresa Fichele

The Benefits Of "Buongiorno"

Our Naples-based psychiatrist reflects on her morning walk to work, as she passes by people who simply want to see a friendly smile.

In Naples, lonely people leave their homes early in the morning. You can tell they're lonely by the look in their eyes. Mostly men, often walking a dog, typically mixed breeds that look as scruffy as their owners. You see them heading to the coffee bar, chatting with the newsstand owner, buying cigarettes, timidly interacting with each another.

This morning as I was going to work, I tried to put myself in their shoes. I woke up tired and moody, but as soon as I left the building, I felt compelled, like every day, to say to dozens of "buongiorno!" (good morning!) and smile in return just as many times.

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Italy
Mariateresa Fichele

Polish Paranoia In Naples

Our Naples-based psychiatrist tries to relieve a patient of his anxiety over a very specific delusion of persecution.

"Dottoré, I'm being followed by the Polish! They don't understand that when I'm out, I'm dizzy with my medication, they'll end up running me over!"

"The Polish? Francé, where have you ever seen Polish people in Naples — and on top of that, why would they be following you?"

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Italy
Mariateresa Fichele

Back To School, For Those Who Can Afford It

Our psychologist discusses schooling struggles and deep inequalities with her Neapolitan patients.

In most Italian municipalities, school cafeterias and full-day school schedules begin at the same time as the teaching calendar. Yet in Naples, for years I've been hearing the following:

"To start the school lunch service, we have to wait for a company to win the contract bidding!"

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Italy
Mariateresa Fichele

One Painting, Many Women

One patient tells our Naples-based Dottoré about trauma and aptly-named victims.

“Dottoré, when I was a kid, I was told at catechism:

‘Do you know that you have the name of a bad woman? When she was a child, a man hurt her very badly, but instead of forgiving, she harbored angry feelings. When she got older, that hatred pushed her to make horrible paintings, depicting scenes of terrible violence. You should not become like her. You must learn to forgive and transform hatred into love. This is the only way you can become a good wife, mother, and woman who will be welcomed into heaven.’”

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Dottoré!
Mariateresa Fichele

On Feeling Different — But Being Unique

Our Naples-based psychiatrist offers a short-and-sweet exchange with a patient, on what it means to feel "different".

Dottoré, am I different?”

“No, you are unique, and in that uniqueness, special.”

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Dottoré!
Mariateresa Fichele

When A Psychiatrist Is Provoked

Our Neapolitan psychiatrist recounts a chance meeting with an old patient, and the benefits of taking the bait.

If a psychiatrist is as good at his job as I am, he would never fall for the provocations of his patients. Instead, he would take these provocations in, and infuse them with new meaning under the reasoned context of psychotherapy.

Let me give you an example. Today, I encountered Carmela in the street.

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